Happy this week, all! Also: huge apologies to the World Cup organisers and teams for any matchside cosmic sabotage brought on by our struggle to feed the Maw. Truth be told, Mexico should have had last night’s game in the bag, if only I’d topped up the Maw’s feeding trough on Friday with another handful of Slay the Spire 2 stories. In its hunger, the creature broke containment, and fell upon the sacred realm of association football, kindling all manner of pandemonium.

You may have noticed that half of Mexico’s goal shots vanished in flight, for example, leaving behind a turquoise haze and the aroma of burning locusts. You may have noticed that Jude Bellingham had six more legs than is customary, for a champions league player. Or perhaps you didn’t notice any of that because you were too busy thinking about this week’s forthcoming PC game releases. Here are a few I’ve got my eye on.

Monday 6th July

• Cosmodrill is about tunnelling through 2D planets and asteroids, much like the silverfish in my bathroom tunneling beneath the lino. A caveat: it uses genAI for language localisation in certain regions.

Tuesday 7th July

• Estrellas Mecanicas is a Dragon Bally retro 2D fighter with crunchy crimson pixelart.
• In Fugaz you are a… cat? Beetle? Some sort of demon? Whatever you are, you’re stuck in a Dark Place and must solve puzzles using a flute.
• NTE: Neverness to Everness is a glitzy open world anime RPG in which you drive sportscars, uppercut dragons, and hold hands with your catgirl friend. There is talk of a lovestruck otter, also robot butlers.

Wednesday 8th July

• Transhumance is a platformer in which you are a shepherd, guiding your flock to the summer pastures. Instead of a sheepdog, you get a dragonfly. I can roll with this.
• Veritas Tales: Witch of the Dark Castle is a gamebook-style RPG consisting of over 300 illustrations, created by a former Vanillaware developer.

Thursday 9th July

• AC4 remake Assassin’s Creed Black Flag Resynced has finally set sail. “Surprisingly clumsy”, Julian called the preview build a few months ago. Let’s see if Ubisoft have caulked the gaps in the hull.
• Echoes of Aincrad is a new action-RPG from Bandai Namco in which you fight the God of Death, and look at some nice windmills.
• Mesmalie is a visual novel about a young witch learning to tame her abilities, after accidentally lighting her house on fire. I have accidentally lit my house on fire several times and never once have I been invited to any covens.
• Polytropos: A Tactical Odyssey is a turn-based strategy RPG featuring Ancient Greek monsters that looks like the kind of thing I’d have enjoyed discovering on a Mac shareware CD in the 90s.

Friday 10th July

• In The Lost Mixtape, you a hapless trash panda who has succumbed to the power of Sony Walkman. Rather than rummaging in dumpsters for food, you now search only for cassettes. I fear this raccoon has not long to live.
• Mothkeep is here to kick ass and identify a range of central European moth species – and it’s all out of asses.
• This week’s friendsloperation is Forest Escape: Last Train, in which up to four players travel through a prison warden’s broken brain. Trains and forests aside, you can expect abandoned themeparks.
• Take care of the dog, you muppet, you loser.

This week is likely to be a busy one for news. Microsoft appear to be on the verge of announcing a load of job cuts and studio closures. Usefully, I am going to be on a press trip for much of it. Julian, meanwhile, is nibbling away at some of those precious “interviews” he’s so fond of, while James hatches diabolical schemes for one particular RPS site section – I won’t spoil.

Mark is on a boat somewhere, terrorising the gulls with his singing and hopefully not grieving over the closure of Obsidian Entertainment. Callum continues his efforts to itemise all of Roblox, so that we can feed the whole platform to the Maw and be rid of Grow a Garden 2 forever. What are you doing this week? You are allowed to mention the football.