The Ashes 2025-26: ‘England must stir themselves to find a Christmas miracle’ in Boxing Day Test


In that dizzying summer of 2022, the Bazball vibes breathed life into an England Test team that could not win on the field and were weary of Covid restrictions off it.

Now the accusation is that England have become too chill. You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.

England have unravelled despite, and because, of the approach of Stokes and coach Brendon McCullum.

New Zealander McCullum, a fan of the All Blacks’ famous ‘no dickheads’ policy, signed off on the trip to Noosa and all the risks it entailed.

The policy was designed by mental skills coach Gilbert Enoka to allows players to police themselves. Enoka has worked with England under McCullum.

Stokes has seen the worst side of media scrutiny, following the 2017 incident outside a Bristol nightclub that cost him a place on the subsequent Ashes tour.

“I have first-hand experience of how this can affect people,” said Stokes. “My role as England captain is to protect my players as much as I possibly can.”

It is a fair and admirable stance to take. Maybe it has come too late.

England have faced some unfair allegations on this Ashes tour. Former Australia pace bowler Mitchell Johnson labelled them “arrogant”, which Stokes was right to knock back.

But Stokes’ men have been careless, loose and downright dopey. They knew the traps they could fall into in Australia – director of cricket Rob Key warned them not to do anything “stupid” back in September.

History has repeated itself. On the Ashes tour eight years ago, there was the Jonny Bairstow ‘headbutt’ controversy and Ben Duckett tipping a beer over James Anderson. It led to local media asking Moeen Ali, a practising Muslim, if he will be able to stay out of the pub.

At the end of the 2021-22 tour, a video emerged of a drinking session involving players from both sides having to be broken up by police.

Even without off-field distractions, touring Australia is hard. England’s record in this country this century is played 33, lost 26, won four and drawn three.

Of the four wins, three came in a single series when England lifted the urn in Australia for the only time in the past 39 years.

In the team were England’s greatest opener, their two all-time leading Test wicket-takers, their best spinner of the past 40 years and possibly the most talented batter to ever play for the country. Three players in the squad have been knighted.



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