WASHINGTON — Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth met privately Wednesday with the families of six service members who died in the Iran war and, in a press briefing the next morning, said the message he got was consistent and supportive.

“What I heard through tears, through hugs, through strength and through unbreakable resolve was the same from family after family. They said, ‘Finish this. Honor their sacrifice. Do not waver. Do not stop until the job is done,’” Hegseth said.

One of the people he met at Dover Air Force Base in Delaware was Charles Simmons. His 28-year-old son, Tech. Sgt. Tyler H. Simmons, was among the six crew members killed when their refueling plane crashed in Iraq last week.

Simmons recalled his exchange differently.

“I can’t speak for the other families. When he spoke to me, that was not something we talked about,” he told NBC News in an interview Thursday.

Simmons said he spoke separately to Hegseth and President Donald Trump at Dover and was grateful for the warmth that both men showed him.

He and Hegseth spoke mostly about Tyler, his impressive service record and the speed with which he had advanced in the military, Simmons recalled.

He said he told the defense secretary, “I understand there’s a lot of peril that goes into making decisions like this, and I just certainly hope the decisions being made are necessary.”

Asked if he said anything to Hegseth or Trump about the need to keep fighting the war, Simmons said, “No, I didn’t say anything along those lines.”

A 60-year-old music teacher in Columbus, Ohio, Simmons told NBC News that he has “questions” about the war and isn’t able to draw “definitive conclusions when I don’t have all the data.”

“Who wants war?” he added. “Sometimes it’s a necessity, and I just don’t know what’s going on.”

Pentagon spokesman Sean Parnell said in a statement: “Secretary Hegseth has the utmost respect for our Gold Star families and has pledged to honor the sacrifice of their loved ones. While at Dover, the Secretary spoke with each family of our fallen heroes and the details of each individual conversation remain private.”

White House spokeswoman Olivia Wales said that Trump “grieved” with the “incredible families” of six service members on Wednesday. Trump “shared his love and expressed the deep gratitude of our entire nation. These men and women gave up their lives in defense of our freedom, and President Trump will never forget their honorable service and selfless devotion. They represent the very best of America.”

Simmons last spoke to his only son the day before the fatal plane crash last week. Voice breaking, he said Tyler had told him “how much he loved me.”

His son hoped to become a commercial airplane pilot after eventually retiring from the military, he said.

“Tyler had a magnetic personality,” he said. “Never met any strangers. He’d walk into the room, and it would be immediately illuminated.”

Hegseth’s account of the families’ message echoes comments Trump made after another meeting with the families of six different service members whose bodies were returned to the U.S. earlier this month.

Trump met with those families in Dover at a ceremony on March 7. Speaking to reporters two days later, Trump said that the families were “unbelievable people” and that “every single one” told him the same thing: “Finish the job, sir. Please, finish the job.”

A public official who was within earshot of Trump’s meetings with family members that day told NBC News they did not hear any of them tell Trump to “finish the job” in Iran.

The Dover meetings were part of a ceremony called a “dignified transfer.” The families arrive at the air base to retrieve remains that were flown in and removed in flag-draped containers. If they choose, the families get a chance to meet face-to-face with the president, vice president or other senior officials who sent their loved ones into battle.

Simmons came away from Dover with a better impression of the war’s architects than he had when he arrived. Trump teared up and hugged him, evincing warmth and compassion at odds with the president’s public persona, Simmons said. He also credited Trump for looking him “straight in the eye.”

“He extended his condolences father to father and conveyed how difficult it is to make decisions to put the children of other parents in peril,” Simmons said.

As for Hegseth, “When I talked to him, I got the impression that he was torn because he seemed to be a very compassionate man, faced with difficult decisions as it pertains to war,” Simmons said.

“I also let him know that Tyler was my only son. And you could see the emotion on his face. And I think those kinds of things you can’t fake,” he continued.

“I was pleasantly surprised because the perception is they [Trump and Hegseth] don’t care, they’re going to do what they want to do,” he said. “I got to see a different side of them up close and personal.”

Apart from Simmons, NBC News has reached out to family members of the 12 other service members killed in the Iran war.

Rep. Eugene Vindman, D-Va., an Army veteran who served on the White House’s national security council in Trump’s first term, attended the March 7 dignified transfer after one of his constituents was killed. (Trump ousted him from his position in 2020 after Vindman raised concerns about Trump’s dealings with Ukraine.)

Vindman said he didn’t overhear Trump’s conversations with family members. Still, he voiced doubts that a distraught family member would say something to the president about the war’s necessity or importance.

“The families there are dealing with a terrible, tragic loss,” Vindman said. “They’re still trying to make sense of what the loss means to them personally: losing a husband, father, wife. They’re not thinking about the mission.”

With the conflict in its third week, the Trump administration says that the assault launched by the U.S. and Israel has crippled Iran’s military capabilities and helped to defang the country’s regime. But the war has also caused oil and gas prices to spike as Iran effectively shutters the Strait of Hormuz, a crucial shipping lane. A senior U.S. counterterrorism official, Joe Kent, resigned over the war this week, saying that Iran did not pose an imminent threat to the U.S.

Simmons recalled something his son had told him before volunteering for the mission that ended his life.

“He said, ‘Dad, I can’t give you any details, but if civilians knew what we knew, a lot of the criticism [of the war] would cease,” he said.