Hello, goodbye: The long and winding road of music biopics has finally led us to four feature films about the Beatles, coming in April 2028 by way of Bond director Sam Mendes. The four horsemen of the Beatpocalypse will be Harris “Dom Milk” Dickenson as John Lennon, Paul “Thighs” Mescal as Paul McCartney, Barry “Grave Humper” Keoghan as Ringo Starr, and Joseph “I might be engaged to Doja Cat, but I don’t make a thing of it” Quinn as George Harrison.

The main cast were paraded out at CinemaCon this week, reciting the lyrics to “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band”: “It’s wonderful to be here, it’s certainly a thrill, you’re such a lovely audience, we’d like to take you home with us.” A bit high school amateur dramatics, but a bit lovely, too.

The casting has already been torn to shreds for its lack of actual Liverpudlians, but I’m quite excited to see two scouse Gladiator stars on my screen. Which song from the catalogue will Barry Keoghan strut naked to through a mansion? Have you ever imagined Paul McCartney in short shorts? John Lennon with abs? (Perhaps “Norwegian Wood” was about muscle density?)

The Fab Four getting the biopic treatment is surely a very long time coming; the Beatles, Liverpool’s biggest Trump tariff-free export, are still absolutely huge. They’ve dominated the charts, and long drives with your parents, for decades. They seemingly typified the entire trajectory of the ’60s—Beatlemania, the youthquake, the long hair, the turn to expansive psychedelics. Our collective knowledge about the band “more popular than Jesus” has seeped in almost by osmosis—from Charles Manson’s “Helter Skelter” scenario to John and Yoko’s bed-in and the crosswalk-ing on Abbey Road. John Lennon’s untimely death was a genuine cultural reset.

With all that said, I’m just not sure our nostalgia can sustain us through four whole-ass films. Does anyone really want the “first binge-able theatrical experience”? Who’s keen to buy four tickets to ride at the multiplex? Isn’t one film enough? Surely two would suffice? Beatles biopics may well be like martinis: three is too many, four you feel nauseous.

At this point, no one is quite sure what we’re in for. It’s not a boring project, but is it an exciting one? We all like the Beatles. We all respect the Beatles. We all like “Hey Jude” and “Come Together” and “Get Back.” We liked (portions of) the six-hour Beatles jam on Disney+. But is there anything we don’t know about the band that these four—four!—biopics can reveal? Are there any magical mysteries left to tour? We all have a soft place for John, Paul, George, and Ringo in our Internet-hardened hearts, but, crikey, will we all survive four Beatles-themed press tours?